After I got home from seeing Ella, I was in a state of limbo about Ella. I wasn’t clear on anything, and I still wonder how things can change so fast. Maybe it was just the feeling of seeing her after not seeing her in so long that has made me question my feelings? Could it be my want for a relationship?It’s confession time. When I got home, Ella texted me, and we kept texting or so for about an hour (can’t wait to see the bill...NOT!). General chit chat, small talk, she, or her parents, have a place in Turkey, she’s going in the next week...with Dairy Product Boy presumably.
Still, even though she loves him, (in the same way she said she loved me?) I couldn’t shake the thought of her. When I saw her there was still that something about her that I can only describe as enchanting - she was the only one I could focus on, the only one I wanted to focus on. She was in the spotlight and everyone surrounding her was in a blackout.
Now though, I’ve had a couple of days, and a night out with Lyndsey, to help me digest my feelings for Ella. They’ve been pushed to the side and I know nothing will ever happen with her while she is with the Cheesy. So, if the opportunity ever does I arrive, I can’t say I’d say no, nor can I say I’d say yes. We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.
2 comments:
I like the crossing the bridge mentality. Right now the situation is impossible, but if the opportunity arises in the future...THEN you can sweat the hard decisions. I've been in a similar situation before, but you are definitely approaching it from a more logical perspective than I did.
Women are more attractive when they're taken. As are men. It's a curse from the gods. But if you just realize that's where 50% (or more) of your attraction is coming from, you can discount it.
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